Six Hats of Being a Husband & a Father...

Another leadership role I have is being a husband and a father.

The six hats I have identified (so far) are:
  1. Vision holder and planner
  2. Bread winner
  3. Active Listener
  4. Handyman
  5. Fun and Morale Champion
  6. Boundary setter and Champion
If you have any more hats or ideas, please let me know.

On the weekend, I put on the handyman hat and took on the humbling task of unblocking the septic tank.

For some reason, I kept remembering a scene from the movie:"Whale Rider" It is set on the Marae and the Grandfather, who is a local leader, is digging up the septic tank with his son.

I always judged the grandfather as an ineffective leader, because he had to do the "Kaka" work himself - He seemed to me to be one of those leaders who goes out and sets the example, but no-one follows him.

But it also reminds me of a time I visited a Buddhist temple in Sydney and was told that the man who was cleaning the toilets was a very wealthy doctor....the role of handyman can be very, very humbling.

I was looking through youtube for that scene and came up with this amazing clip about the journey of a father. The seventh hat of the father as leader is "Love" - the sort of love that destroys self interest and ego. The sort of love that builds growth and wisdom, compassion and inner strength.

Whale Rider's them is predominantly about leadership - in the face of non acceptance by the current leader. The heroine gives this lovely speech about leadership:

Leadership ain't easy. It's not comfortable. As Seth Godin says:

"It’s uncomfortable to stand up in front of strangers.
It’s uncomfortable to propose an idea that might fail.
It’s uncomfortable to challenge the status quo.
It’s uncomfortable to resist the urge to settle.

When you identify the discomfort, you’ve found the place where a leader is needed.

If you’re not uncomfortable in your work as a leader, it’s almost certain you’re not reaching your potential as a leader."

I reckon the eighth hat of husband and father is "The Uncomfortable Hat"!

Email Mike...

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