The Process of Change - First Reaction: DENIAL

As humans, we go through change as a process.

This process has some recognisable states.

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The first state is that of DENIAL.   – “This can’t be happening to me – it’s not happening to me!” 
You react by denying that the situation is happening.  In coaching, we call this: “Possum frozen in the headlights” 

I was hired by a large utility company to help manage their change process.  My first day at the office, I was told that there were three men who were sitting on park benches near the office.  They were made redundant on the previous Friday and given their settlement and told not to come back to work.  They didn't have the courage to tell their wives on the weekend.  They got up on Monday morning as usual, got dressed, prepared their lunch and went off to work and sat in the park on a bench.  They had been there for three days.  My job was to go up to them and talk them through their situation.

Imagine what that was like.  Seeing these three men, sitting in different areas of the park, unable to process what had happened to them.  They were stuck in denial.  They were doing what they were capable of.  Like the ostrich, they had their heads in the sand and their bodies on a park bench.

Each man I approached ended up in tears.  They expressed their fears and concerns for the first time since they were made redundant.  They processed themselves through the first stage of dealing with change: Denial.

The best way to deal with denial is to talk about it.  This is where the elephants in the room often are.

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...and when you get through your denial, you are in the next stage of the process: RESISTANCE.

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